


one of those times

by orphan_account



Category: Overwatch (Video Game)
Genre: Angst, F/F, Flashbacks, How Do I Tag, Hurt/Comfort, Internalized Homophobia, Love Letters, M/M, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Panic Attacks, Slow Burn
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-11-16
Updated: 2017-02-08
Packaged: 2018-08-31 10:40:26
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con, Underage
Chapters: 7
Words: 10,185
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8575159
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: Hanzo Shimada was known for disagreeing and arguing, but this was not one of those times.





	1. confessions

**Author's Note:**

> this is like basically my first story aaa  
> the tags and stuff are super messy right now; they'll be updated as the story goes!  
> also, this chapter's like super short- i'll be sure to write longer ones in the future!
> 
> | D im dead inside now ;;; anyways, i hope you enjoy this mess of a story!  
> i'll try to update this as much as possible owo
> 
> (this was not beta read or anything forgive me ;w;)  
> if you see any mistakes and such, please do not hesitate to tell me!

Hanzo Shimada was known for disagreeing and arguing, but this was not one of those times.

Many years ago, when he was just a small dragon who had not yet earned it’s wings or a sense of greed, his father had introduced him to another boy his age.

“You must learn to interact with other people your age.” He was told over and over, “If you are not able to defend yourself or negotiate, you will never be able to succeed later on.”

This boy became his confident- his right hand pal- his.. his best, and only, friend. The two of them became closer as day passed day, and months passed months. It was almost as if they were joined at the hip. It was not long before they started to sneak out during the night to spend more time with each other.

The little dragon was delighted to have someone he could trust by his side. The boy was the only person he knew he could confide his secrets to. His father was too strict- too uncaring of whatever Hanzo wanted to do or say. His mother was barely there because his father insisted she was ‘babying’ him, when all she did was hold him whenever he had a nightmare and tell him it was okay.

And Genji? Genji would never understand the struggles of being the eldest son- the heir of the Shimada Clan. All he ever did was flirt with the girls and play games- things Hanzo did not have time, nor cared whatsoever about. That did not stop him from being jealous of his brother’s lack of responsibilities.

However, the boy... it felt like he could take over the world if the boy was at his side.

 

" _Friend!_ " 

A sudden exclamation pulled him out of his thoughts.

As soon as he heard the familiar voice, Hanzo twirled around, a huge smile forming on his face. Even though today's lessons were tanking his energy, he immediately felt it recharging the second he saw his best friend's face-

His face had a slight grin, a bit of white teeth poking from his mouth. His beautiful, bright brown eyes shone like a full moon in the night sky- it was easy for Hanzo to get lost in them. Freckles were spotted all over his tan skin as well as a light shade of pink. It looked as if he was an angel from above. It look the dragon a few seconds to realize he had to respond.

"Welcome! Please, come over and sit." Hanzo patted the empty area next to him, holding up a cup, "I made us some tea as well, if you would like some."

The two of them sat in comfortable silence, staring at the night sky above them. A few stars were visible, twinkling as if putting on a show. Splotches of red were still visible from the sunset not so long ago. Hanzo felt the sudden urge to spit out something that had been on his mind for a while.

"Can I tell you a secret?"

_"Of course! You can tell me anything."_

"... Promise you won't tell anyone?"

_"Cross my heart and hope to die!"_

_"_ I thought you said you'd stop saying that! You shouldn't ever wish to die!"

_"Hanzo- It's just a saying!"_

_"_ Okay, but seriously-"

_"I won't tell a single soul."_

Hanzo glanced away worriedly. What was he doing? If this ever got out to anyone- god forbid his father ever found out- he would join the graves of his enemy. How did he know? Others who had the same secret as himself revealed were never seen again. There was no way he could ever tell anyone.. 

".. I. I think... I think I might like.. you..."

There was silence.

However, this wasn't the comfortable silence of before, with the two of them drinking tea. This silence felt like the fears that Hanzo desperately tried to keep inside of himself. This silence felt like his father's snide remarks about how pathetic Hanzo was at using a sword like a real Shimada could.

" _What.. did you just say?_ "

He knew this was a bad idea. No one would be able to understand him. Why did he think this boy could? But glancing back at his best friend- the only friend he had ever had- Hanzo realized just how much he trusted the boy. The boy who had been there for him through panic attacks and nightmares and self doubts and anger and happiness and everything in between.

Hanzo looked away once more, feeling tears threatening to fall down his cheeks, "No-nothing.. Please.. just ignore-"

" _Did- did you just say..._ "

When the boy stopped talking, the dragon decided to glance back. A grin was on the boy's face- but this wasn't the sweet, adorable little smile that Hanzo fell in love with many months and months ago. It was out of place- as if someone decided to plant the smile of a madman onto an innocent angel's skin. Cold wind blew down his spine, causing shivers to erupt suddenly.

" _You.. you're disgusting! I can't believe I ever sat next to you!"_ The boy exclaimed with such disgust and anger in his voice as he stood quickly, brushing away anything that could have been in contact with Hanzo, " _If I had known from the beginning, I wouldn't have even looked at you!"_

The tears he was trying to hold back suddenly fell, his hands clasping together, pleading with all of his life, "Please! Do not tell anyone what I had said!"

_Disgusting disgusting _disgusting _disgusting _disgusting _disgusting _ _ _ _disgusting _disgusting-__________

Suddenly a hand grasped Hanzo's long, flowing hair, pulling him up to meet the boy's eye level. His brown eyes were full of something he couldn't describe- but it just didn't fit- it didn't fit the boy he knew and loved-

" _I won't tell you.. on one condition..._ " The boy pulled him close, their faces not even a mere inch apart. A grin widened on his face as he whispered, " _Give me all of you..."_

Hanzo Shimada was known for disagreeing and arguing, but this was not one of those times.


	2. harsh kisses

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Don’t worry, friend. I’ll treat you real nice.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this chapter contains non-con elements and such! if you wanna skip past it, go to the "->".

Hanzo’s eyes widened before being pushed into a wall. His hands were pinned as he flailed with no success. He felt cornered, scared, frightened, panicked- all these emotions flowing through his brain at the same time. _How could he not see this happening? Why did he not consider betrayal?_

“ _Don’t worry, friend. I’ll treat you real nice._ ”

It went too quickly for him to think.

One second he felt harsh kisses and bites on his lips. The next foreign hands explored all around his body. Hanzo felt his pants being tugged down and pains erupted, sending shudders throughout his entire body. He swore he heard screams and sobs faintly ringing in his head- it took him a long while to realize it was him making those terrible noises. He tried clawing at whatever was pinning him down but stopped instantly as soon as he felt slaps to his face- purple bruises were definitely going to show up.

He doesn’t remember when his vision starting going blurry. It felt as if the corner of his eyes were slowly forming a vignette, making it hard for him to . His chest was rising up and down at a pace too fast to be considered normal and oh god, he couldn’t breath- he couldn’t breathe he couldn’t breathe he couldn’t-

There was a flash of green and suddenly his vision turned black; he took in a bunch of ragged breaths, allowing the silent darkness to embrace him. There was no pain, no hands, no betrayal-

“Hanzo! Hanzo- oh god-” He could hear a voice in the back of his head but nothing was showing up in his vision. He felt exposed, as if everyone in the entire world had their eyes on him. Suddenly the voice came back, “Hanzo! It’s me, Genji-”

Genji... his brother... why was _he_ here?

“G-g-gen-” Hanzo tried to call out for him but he just kept stuttering ( _since when did Hanzo Shimada stutter?_ ) It was only now that the full realization of what had just happened hit him- and it hit _hard._ How could he be so weak? He was the heir to the Shimada Clan! He had to be strong- _he had to be-_

“Hanzo! It’s me- You’re okay. He’s gone.. He won’t hurt you anymore! Look me in the eyes, please-”

He tried to concentrate all of his energy to opening his eyes. His vision started to come back to him. A blurry figure with bright green hair stood before him. Hanzo let out a choked cough, furiously wiping tears away from his face. He felt so tired- so incredibly tired. _When was this going to be over?_

Genji went to cup his face on Hanzo’s cheeks to wipe away tears, but he flinched at the sudden touch, his hands insistently going up to shield himself. _Was his brother going to hurt him too? Who else was going to betray him?_

The younger brother let out a slight gasp, jerking back. A few tears dripped from his eyes as well as he whispered hoarsely, “Brother.. what.. what did he _do_ to you...”

The dragon felt shame rising up his stomach- _Did he really think Genji would ever hurt him? How could he have let this happen? Where did he go wrong?_ All Hanzo ever wanted was a friend... someone who he could trust.. someone who would always be by his side... _Was there no one like that for him? Was there no one he could truly consider to be a friend?_

“I-I- t-thought I could t-t-trust him....” The effort he put in to suppress and limit the natural emotions his father ridiculed him of had gone to waste as he spoke. Tears fell freely down his bruised cheeks.

Genji sat right in front of his brother, holding one of his hands softly. He could feel the flinch, but as soon as Hanzo realized it was only his brother, he relaxed (even if it was just a bit). The younger brother spoke softly, looking directly into his eyes, “It wasn’t your fault. He was sick- terribly sick to take advantage of you. Hanzo, please listen. It wasn’t your fault-”

“G-genji...” He could only muster enough energy to speak his brother’s name before his eyes began getting droopy. Suddenly, the emptiness and silence of darkness seemed very inviting.

 

* * *

->  _How could you do that you worthless pathetic excuse of a human being? How could you do that to your own brother. Do you know what you have done? Do you know the pain you have inflicted on him? How could you obey the orders of your father over the life of someone who comforted you through your panic attacks and nightmares and that night-_

* * *

 

Jesse McCree didn’t know what to think of Hanzo Shimada. All he knew was he almost murdered one of his close friends, Genji. At first, he was horrified to find that the green cyborg had forgiven his brother. How could anyone forgive a betrayal as violent and horrific as that?

However, after hearing bits and pieces about the elder Shimada brother’s life, Jesse found it a bit easier to forgive Hanzo as well. He heard them all- stories of strict parents and nightmares and panic attacks; but one particular story caught his eye.

Genji had met up with his brother years after their last encounter and he was excitedly talking about how much he missed having Hanzo by his side. He was rambling on and on about their childhood.

“It’s been years and my brother still hasn’t made any new friends or allies. It’s really funny though. He used to have this one friend, gosh it’s been so long I don’t even remember his name- but they were seriously attached to the hip. But then one night, I heard some screaming or crying or something and when I went, the boy was-”

He didn’t realize, however, how much private information he was giving until he glanced up and saw McCree’s horrified expression. Instantly, Genji started to stammer, “I-I mean- n-nothing- please, ignore-”

“What ‘ta _hell_ Genji! What happened?”

“Forgive me; It looks like I have important matters I must attend.” The cyborg immediately bowed, excusing himself from the room as quickly as possible.

Jesse had a long time to think to himself. By the way Genji talked about his brother, it seemed as if Hanzo really did regret everything he did to his younger brother. It also seemed as if he had gone through troubles himself and his parents were super strict- so it wasn't as if Hanzo really wanted to harm him in any way. However, he just couldn't seem to grasp why Hanzo could have even _considered_ hurting Genji.

However, he had to respect the dragon's privacy, so he decided not to further question it. Genji never spoke of that night ever again.

 

* * *

  _You don't deserve to live after what you did. You don't deserve your life. How could you hurt him like that? How could you kill him without hesitation? Do you really value your position in the Shimada Clan more than your own brother?_

* * *

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> woot! another chapter! hopefully this one isn't too terrible | D  
> thank you so so much for all the kudos and nice comments <33


	3. brown eyes

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> All he could think of when he was walking back was the man’s brown eyes...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i'm obsessed with writing angst...

_-hanzo-_

Hanzo could not believe he was doing this. Being apart of a banned organization was not something he was unaccustomed too. It was who invited him to join- Genji- his brother. Genji- His vision started to get blurry as a flashback started to play in his head.

He was back in Hanamura, his old home where he had grown up. Despite the horrible nightmares he had whenever he visited the place, Hanzo insisted on coming every year to honor his brother. Usually he had no problem sneaking in- after all, the dragon spent his entire childhood growing up there, learning every single place he could hide or exploit. However, this time was different. There was green omnic of some sort who admitted to watching Hanzo for some time. When the robot had revealed himself to be his long lost younger brother, Hanzo didn’t know what to say.

Genji had forgiven him, even after the horrific encounter they had. Hanzo didn’t deserve to have forgiveness after what he had done. How did he- Hanzo Shimada- have such a caring brother who loved him even if his flaws were near lethal? At first, he could only fall to his knees and clasp his hands, begging and pleading that he was sorry. His brother, shocked at the sudden change, dropped down to the floor and insisted that there were no hard feelings but he just could not believe it was true.

_Genji. He was really alive..._

 

Loud talking brought him back to reality. Hanzo felt himself tense up, hand gripping his bow tightly, scanning for immediate danger. He could feel sweat starting to form on his face and palms as he trembled, eyes shooting all around. He didn’t even realize the arms on his shoulder or the worrying chatter but as soon as he did, Hanzo felt like screaming as his eyes stared to form tears. Memories flew through his face of that night- _No not again not again not again  
_

Hanzo felt his shoulders being released, pulling away from the stranger. He now realized that his eyes were shut completely- he decided to take a risk and opened them.

_Brown eyes._  
_Beautiful brown eyes._

Blinking a bit more, he realized the eyes belonged to a... cowboy? His mouth was moving but he couldn’t hear the words coming out. The man had a messy, unkept beard and a ridiculous looking cowboy hat. If Hanzo wasn’t close to tears, he would’ve laughed at the man’s comical costume. What did that belt say- BAMF?

  
“Darlin’, can ya hear me?” A soothing, deep voice filled his ears. He had an accent similar to the ones in the movies he and Genji watched when they were younger.

_Genji-_

Hanzo only remembered the cowboy’s face going closer to his, eyes full of concern, before darkness consumed him once more.

 

_“Brother! Look what I can do!” Genji squeaked excitedly in their native language, tugging onto Hanzo’s arm to get his attention, “I can finally do it! I finally learned the dragon!”_

  
_The elder brother raised an eyebrow- when had his brother learned to control the dragon? It felt like only days when Genji was a little baby... He put on a grin before waving his hand to indicate he was ready to observe. The green haired teen’s face morphed into a huge smile before jumping back and taking in deep breaths. He then gripped the end of his sword and called out, “Ryūjin no ken o kurae!”_

  
_Green smoke started to form out of the blade, a roar filling their ears. Hanzo watched with pride as the smoke turned into a dragon spirit. It looked similar to the twin dragons he could call himself. However, the main difference had to be the color- while Hanzo’s were a sky blue color, Genji’s was a soft green. He observed the curious dragon who was now looking around like a child who was seeing snow for the first time._

  
_A few seconds later, however, the dragon disappeared without a trace._

  
_Hanzo couldn’t help but laugh, embracing his brother with a new sense of pride in his stomach. Genji- his brother- was now able to control the dragons. He pulled back a bit to smile, “Genji, you make me so proud._  
  
_I’ll always be there for you.”_

 

* * *

 

_-mccree-_

  
It was not often Jesse McCree saw someone who made his jaw drop and heart stop. Today was his lucky day. He was talking with Lúcio Correia dos Santos, one of the new members of Overwatch- something about music tastes (he faintly remembers the young DJ’s face scrunching up when he revealed his favorite genre of music was country). However, something caught his eye- a figure not so far away was standing still. _Strange_ , Jesse thought, _if someone was here to infiltrate the base, you would think they would be secretive..._

  
He couldn’t forget about it, so he said farewell to Lúcio and headed off to the stranger. Even as he got closer, the figure did not make any attempt to move. Once he got closer, the cowboy could see them clearer- and boy was this man a sight-

  
Jesse had to let out a breath he didn’t realize he was holding and observed a bit more. The man looked as if he could kill with his glare. An intimidating bow was held in his left hand. His legs looked as if they had prosthetics- or maybe he just had small feet. He glanced up the man’s shoulder- a beautifully done dragon tattoo rested all the way from his left shoulder down to his wrist. Looking up to the man’s face, he noticed his eyes were full of fear and his face was starting to sweat.

  
“Whoa, darlin’, ya okay?” McCree went over quickly, instinctively placing his hands on the man’s shoulder to comfort him. However, after a few seconds, the man flinched, pulling himself away. He swore he could see tears in his eyes- _were those tears?_

  
The cowboy felt guilt forming in his stomach, “Oh god, sorry! Oh god- look, I ain’t touching ya no more.”

  
He watched as the man’s eyes slowly opened.

  
_Brown eyes._  
_Beautiful brown eyes._

  
Jesse could feel the man’s eyes observing him. It made him feel a bit self-conscious, but now was not the time for such feelings. He took a tiny step closer, careful not to touch the man, “Darlin’, can ya hear me?”

  
Apparently, that was not the thing to say. The dragon’s eyes shut almost instantly before the man collapsed into the cowboy’s arms. McCree let out a few curses under his breath before carrying the man. He wasn’t heavy but he sure as hell wasn’t light.

  
All he could think of when he was walking back was the man’s brown eyes...

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i was thinking of updating every other day but this week has been hectic | D  
> nonetheless, i hope you guys enjoy this chapter! you all have been so nice with your comments <33


	4. just this once

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Brother! You must join us at the party tonight. You never socialize with people our age! Do you even know what fun is?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i'm so very sorry about not updating in like a month. i've been so wrapped up in school and winter break that i've had no time to write. so thank you so much for continuing to read my story and thank you so much for all of your support. i mean seriously? 2000+ hits and 100+ kudos???? i hope you like this chapter!!

_-hanzo-_  
  
“Brother! You must join us at the party tonight.” Genji jumped enthusiastically around his older brother, words slurring into each other as he tried to convince Hanzo to have fun for once, “You never socialize with people our age! Do you even know what fun is?”  
  
The elder dragon took in a deep breath, his eyes still focused on the book in his hands. His father had told them he was teaching a new move on the sword and he did not want to be a disappointment.  
  
“Genji, you know I have to work. Father mentioned a new move he was going to teach and I must work ahead.” Hanzo glanced up, slowly crossing his arms. He knew how irresponsible his brother was at times,“Of course, I would greatly recommend you do the same. However, I understand children like you cannot grasp the idea of learning on your own.”  
  
He watched as his brother let out a groan, his face turning into a frown, “You really care more about studying rather than hanging out with your own brother? Hanzo, I will never understand you. Please have fun, just this once! Just for me!”  
  
Hanzo Shimada was known for disagreeing and arguing, but this was not one of those times.  
  
Setting down the ancient book gently on his bed-stand, the teen brushed off some dust on his clothing before standing up to his full size. He tried to look annoyed as he rolled his eyes but he couldn’t help the grin starting to form on his face. Genji squealed happily, grabbing on to Hanzo’s arm, “Thank you so much, brother! You definitely won’t regret going to a party with me.”  
  
The two of them waited until night fell before escaping the palace and heading into darkness. Only now did Hanzo realize how little he stared into the night sky. It was dotted with white, sparkling dots that seemed to appear and disappear before he could even blinked. Every other time he looked up, he could only see a pitch dark sky, something he found very uninteresting and worthless to spend time looking at, but the more he stared in awe now, the more he could see the vibrant colors that really filled it. Deep blues and purples could be seen all around with patches of dark red and a slight bit of green painted in between.   
  
“Hanzo! Hurry up! We have to get seats before all of them are taken!” The younger brother jumped forward, pointing at the entrance that was quickly filling with people, “You see that place? That’s where we’re headed- the arcade!”  
  
“Are you sure I am allowed to enter? I was not given an invitation to attend this party-”  
  
The elder teen let out a tired sigh as he watched Genji dart into the door. He followed closely, trying not to let his anxiety raise at the amount of people surrounding him. Hanzo quickly spotted his brother in the crowd when he was suddenly grabbed by the arm. He quickly twirled around, his fists ready to defend himself.  
  
In front of him was a teenage boy, probably around his age. Hanzo didn’t notice his jaw, which was definitely slightly opened and drooling, or his eyes, which were definitely staring right into the boy’s stunning brown eyes.  
  
“Uh.. hello?” The boy looked worried as he held onto his arm, “I’m sorry; I couldn’t help but notice you looked really lost. I’m Erin, by the way.”  
  
Hanzo mumbled the name under his breath. As soon as he said it, he felt his whole body relax and calm down, almost as if all his worries (along with his heart... _Did he really just think that?_ _Get yourself together, you fool!_ ) had been swept away by the boy. He brought himself back to reality, scratching the back of head with his hand, before  quickly bowing towards the stranger, “Sorry for getting in your way. I was looking for my brother. I’m.. Hanzo...”  
  
“I’m afraid I don’t know where your brother is, Hanzo...” Erin glanced into crowd before grabbing onto his two hands, a smile seemingly stuck onto his face, “But I’m sure he’s okay hanging out by himself. How about we go hang out and play some games? I’d love to talk to you more...”

  
The elder dragon carefully thought about his choices- either he could go find Genji and spend the entire night being introduced and talked to.. or he could hang out with Erin... He felt a meek grin growing onto his face as he held the boy’s hands back, “Well, lead the way.”  
  


* * *

 

“Doctor! Doc- how is my brother doing? Oh god, how- how did this happen- what happened?” A frantic voice started to fill Hanzo’s head. He wanted to desperately whoever was worrying him that he was okay and there was no need to worry, but he knew that was a complete lie. After all, Hanzo couldn’t even open his eyes. A different voice- this time, more calming- made him feel relaxed and safe, “Genji, he’s fine. I believe he has not had rest in quite some time, so let’s continue this conversation outside and let him relax a bit.” There was quiet shuffling before his mind was filled was silence.

 

What.. _happened_? Hanzo’s mind was hazy- no particular memory stood out. To some, this may have been eery or scary, even. However, to the elder brother, the thought of getting rid of his inner demons and nightmares was welcoming and pleasant. He cautiously took in a few breaths, trying to get himself to calm down when suddenly his dragons appeared before him.  
  
“ _Have you forgotten that you killed your brother? How dare you think you deserve this peace and quiet?_ ” One of them hissed into his ears, making him flinch, “ _You must leave this ‘paradise’ of yours. Do not forget that you are not worthy to have anyone in your life that cares about you._ ”

  
Immediately, the air around Hanzo felt cold and unwelcoming. His face began to sweat and he felt enclosed, as if the darkness was somehow getting smaller and smaller. He could feel his eyes widening in fear as the dragons that used to be so kind and loving towards him grow bigger, taking up most of his sight. Cold air sent shivers down his back; all he wanted was for it to be over- _why couldn’t it be over?_

* * *

 

“ _-oddamnit..._ Doc! There’s somethin’ wrong-” A southern accented voice suddenly drew him away from his dragons and back into reality. His eyes blinked a few times, his vision blurry ( _he was most definitely not crying.. Dragons don’t cry!_ ) Hanzo tried to sit up but his arms were too sore and tired to push him. He then heard some rustling and breathing getting closer to him, “Oh god, are ya awake-”

  
It was then did Hanzo’s eyes finally focus enough to see the man in front of him-

  
Brown eyes.  
  
 _Beautiful brown eyes._  
  
Tan skin.

_Were those freckles?_  
  
Strangely familiar...  
  
“Doc! _Doc! Gengi!_ Please hurry up! He-he’s- damn it _damn it_ -”

* * *

 

Hanzo sat at his desk, furiously tapping his pencil as he thought of was to start this letter. It was night outside; moonlight shone into his windows and the only sound that could be heard were the chirping of crickets outside (he thought this setting and mood would help him calm and actually get to writing instead of procrastinating.)

  
“ _Dearest Erin,_ ” He read aloud. Did that sound too cheesy? Too direct? Hanzo felt his face turning red as he quickly erased the first line. He sighed as the paper once again left a smudge, “Father is going to wonder why I’m wasting so much paper...”

  
Taking out another paper and another breath, Hanzo started to write anything that came to mind, “ _Dear Erin, I greatly enjoyed our time at the party. I wish to have another encounter-_ ” He erased and changed a few words, not being able to make up his mind, “ _Perhaps you may meet me by the arcade again sometime? -Hanzo_ ” The elder brother frowned a bit, squinting at how he signed his paper. It was much messier than usual. Maybe he should-

  
“I think you should keep the dearest Erin.” Hanzo jumped as he heard the voice behind him. Grabbing onto his letter quickly, he twirled around, anger clearly on his face. Genji stood there with a grin from ear to ear, “Aww, is my older brother in _loooooove?_ ”

  
He could feel his face turning red- how could he have missed his creaky door open? And how could he have possibly not heard careless brother’s loud and warning footsteps? And how did he not notice a presence behind him, reading his every word (which were directed to a _friend_ , thank you very much).

  
“Genji! What did I say about going in my room without permission? _Get out!_ ”

  
“But _THE_ Hanzo Shimada is writing a letter. A _love_ letter, nonetheless! But that’s not all- it’s a love letter to someone he met at a _party_! (I know! Shocking!) But what’s so strange about that party?  It’s a party.. that _I_ invited _him_ to go to! But that’s not all! The ‘someone’ happens to be... _A MAN!!!!!_ _THE_ Hanzo Shimada is writing a love letter to a _MAN_ he met a party that _I_ -”

  
“ _GENJI!_ Shut your mouth and go to your room!” Hanzo’s face was red, and he could feel it almost bursting into flames. How dare his brother come into his room and accuse him of writing a love letter- to a man nonetheless? That was ridiculous! Why- why would he _ever_ (ha) write a love letter (ha) to a (ha) man..?!!?! When Genji didn’t move from his spot, the elder brother snapped, “ _NOW!_ ”

  
He heard snickering and footsteps, and only when he heard the door creak close did he finally let out a breath. Hanzo could still his face burning from embarrassment. _If he wasn’t writing a love letter, why did Genji saying he did bother him so much...?_

  
The elder brother rubbed his forehead- this was starting to hurt his head. Maybe he would think about it another day, but for now.. he needed to rest...


	5. hot for the sun

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Fareeha, don’tcha be laughing at Genji or I’ll pass on the memo on to Doc that’cha really like her eyes

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> don't mind me, updating once every five thousand centuries.  
> here's an update for you guys! hope you like it :>  
> mccree is surprisingly harder to write than I thought so if i'm totally writing his character wrong, please help me | D

**- _mccree-_**

If Hanzo Shimada was not in the medical bay and was not healing from a panic attack, McCree may have just punted him into the sun. Well... maybe not... the man was too hot for the sun.

“ _Goddamit_. Snap outta it, Jesse.” The cowboy mumbled to himself, shaking his head slightly to get himself focused, “Stop thinking ‘bout Genji’s brother.”

Jesse McCree blamed Gengi’s dragon tattooed brother for not being able to focus the entire day. Not only could he not pay attention during the early morning meeting, but he had a personal low training session (Fareeha totally rubbed that in his face. _The nerve of her..._ ) However, he couldn’t help but feel responsible for Hanzo’s current situation. The first time they saw each other, the man literally froze in fear, and the second time their eyes met, the cowboy sent the man into a panic attack that required Angela to put him to sleep in order for him to calm down.

He was on his way to the common room when he passed by the medical bay. Inside, he could hear quick Japanese mixed in with sniffing and soft sobbing. He instantly recognized the voice as Genji Shimada- after all, the cyborg’s robotic voice was not hard to distinguish, not to mention he was the only person on the base that could speak fluent Japanese like that.

Well... maybe not the only one who could any longer.

_Hanzo Shimada._

McCree didn’t know what to think about the man. On one hand, he was really aesthetically pleasing and didn’t seem like much harm so far. On the other hand, he _did_ kind of almost murder his brother (who was, by the way, McCree’s best friend back in the old Overwatch). However, Genji did also say he had forgiven his brother for doing what he did (so maybe McCree “can find it in his heart to forgive him”, as the Japanese cyborg put it).

He needed to clear his mind. His hands instinctively went down to his side; the familiar feeling of Peacekeeper’s shape had always calmed him down. It was a gift McCree had received from Gabriel Reyes- former leader of Blackwatch. That man had saved him from a lifetime in jail because of his old gang. The two of them had a very close family-like relationship.

Of course, that was before Jack Morrison was (wrongly, thank you very much) given the position of Strike-Commander. Gabe started to get more aggressive and suddenly, the relationship they had built up seemed to crumble. The man couldn’t seem to accept that he did not receive the position he deserved. Even though Jesse completely agree with Gabriel that he deserved being commander of Overwatch more, he understood that continuing this arguing would destroy Overwatch from inside. He tried his best to calm down his leader, but this only made Gabe believe he was no longer on his side and instead thought Jack was right. The situation got worse and worse every second. Gabriel and Jack couldn’t even be in the same room without jumping at each other’s necks. Jesse could not longer have a conversation with ‘Gabe’ or ‘Jack’; instead, he was almost always met with ‘Commander Gabriel Reyes of Blackwatch’ and ‘Strike-Commander Jack Morrison of Overwatch’. It got so bad that not even a week later, McCree packed his gun and serape and left Overwatch for good. The two of them probably didn’t even notice his absence.

He was so lost in his memories that he didn’t notice Fareeha in front of him.

“Oh hello Jesse!” Instantly, she could notice McCree did not seem in the best of moods, “Uh, are you okay? You are frowning for no reason. Is it because of earlier? I said I was sorry!”

“No. It’s.. it was somethin' else. _Yeah.._ somethin' else. Don't worry 'bout it. Sorry for bumping into ya, sis’.”

She also instantly noticed that was a complete lie. Putting a hand on her hip, she pursed her lips with a glare on her face, “ _Jesse McCree_ , that better have not been a lie!”

“Whoops.” He quickly tried to duck of the way to avoid the lady’s wrath but she stepped in front of him.

“You said you were going to stop lying to me! You said you would at least try!”

“Sorry. It’s a bit.. er.. _personal_. I’m sure ya can understand a man wantin’ to keep his secrets, ya know?”

“It’s Genji’s brother, isn’t it? You seemed nervous and out of focus ever since he arrived.” Fareeha let out a laugh as she watched his face turned red and sputtered denial, “I just took a wild guess and I happened to be right! Aw, that’s just _adorable_ , isn't it! A cowboy and a samurai! I can’t even begin to imagine a better pairing than that! Can I come up with your ship name? How does Hanzee sound? _No..._ that won't do. It sounds like a circus performer, does it not? Never-mind that. We can always come up with a better one later. Now, imagine what _Genji_ would think about you trying to pursue-”

McCree saw a flash of green down the hallway, a telltale sign of the younger Shimada brother. He panicked- how embarrassing would it be for Genji to hear this conversation? He quickly put a hand over his little sister’s mouth, “Actually, Fareeha... I think it’s time for ya to _stop talking_ , don’tcha think?”

“Ah, don’t worry McCree. I heard everything you said.” Genji’s voice came way too close than he had expected, causing him to jump away. The cowboy quickly got his act together before realizing what the ninja had just said, “Ah shoot. Genji, _please_ tell me yer lyin’.”

The green cyborg tilted his head to the side a bit as if he were a cat before trying to mimic McCree’s southern accent, “ _Sorry. It’s a bit.. er- personal._ ”

“Okay! Okay! I get it!” Jesse’s face had turned completely red now. Great. Now two of the biggest gossipers in all of Overwatch, and maybe even the world, knew about a secret he had gotten only yesterday night. Do they really know him that well that they could easily pick up on his feelings like that or was he really that easy to read? McCree couldn’t let anyone else know about it. If it got to Hana Song, that little gremlin with connections, he could never show his face ever again. Well, it’s not like he already couldn’t show his face. What was the price on his head now- sixty million? And it’s _still_ rising?

He gave the two of them a hard glare, placing one hand on his hip to mock Fareeha. He knew exactly what to say to get them to shut their mouth, “Y’all best not spread this ‘round or else I’ll tell ‘em all about _yer_ crushes.”

“Yeah, as if you knew who we like, McCree.” Genji let out a laugh. To any stranger, it would’ve sounded confident, as if he was sure Jesse was just bluffing, but the cowboy had known him for years and could immediately identify it as his nervous laugh.

“Well, _Genji_ , I’m sure Zenyatta’ll be _very_ disappointed to hear ya don’t have any feelings towards ‘im-”

The ninja stuttered on his spit a bit, “What- What are you talk-talking about?” If the younger Shimada brother wasn’t wearing his cyborg mask, McCree knew he would most definitely be turning red. He could hear Fareeha trying to quiet down her snickering. _One down, one more to go._

“Fareeha, don’tcha be laughing at Genji or I’ll pass on the memo on to Doc that’cha _really_ like her eyes-”

“Shut up!” Now it was her sputtering and turning red, “You did not need to say it out loud you- _you_ -”

“Now you two be good children. I trust ya won’t say a word to anyone.” Jesse tipped the end of his hat, knowing he had won this conversation. It was actually the first win he had against the two gremlins in a while. Usually the two of them had a lot of blackmail (like that one time he called Ana an ‘older grandma version of Angela.’ That was the worst week of his entire life) but this time, it was him getting the last laugh, “Better close ya mouth Fareeha, or ya might caught a fly in ya mouth.”

_Oh, how the tables have turned._

 

* * *

 

 

**- _hanzo_ -**

That man.

_Those eyes._

Hanzo knew those eyes. How could he ever forget Erin’s beautiful, brown eyes, staring at him with his contagious smile, and little freckles that adorned his face and his-

“ _Snap out of it!_ ” He tried to tell himself, “ _Remembering the old days would only bring pain._ ” But Hanzo just couldn’t help but wonder- what was Erin doing out of Japan? And what was he doing at Watchpoint: Gibraltor? Was he thinking of joining Overwatch as well? Who had invited him? Did his _brother_ invite him-

“Hanzo. Breath in for me.” A soothing voice filled his head. The voice reminded him of an angel. Maybe the beings above felt pity and sorrow for him and sent one to make his life better. He could hear quickly rustling and the sound of high heels clicking on the floor.

He took in a deep breath and breathed out. Slowly, he felt like he was calming down. A beam of warmth started to wrap itself around his body. Hanzo swore he could smell the cherry blossoms from his hometown, Hanamura. The elder Shimada tried to open his eyes- he could only make out a being with wings before suddenly being blinded by the sunlight.  He could hear soft laughter trying to be muffled, “Hanzo, go back to sleep. You need rest.”

“ _Genji... Erin...._ ” The man tried to speak more words but ended up coughing harshly instead. The heels clicking on the floor got louder before they stopped right next to him. The angel put a hand onto his forehead and whispered softly, “Don’t worry. They’re... fine...”

The man could feel himself suddenly getting sleepy. Right before he could let the darkness consume him, he swore he heard the angelic being mutter something that sounded strangely like ‘ _Erin_ ’.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> my tumblr is http://oui-okay.tumblr.com/ if you guys want to bother me with art/fanfic requests.
> 
> i also have overwatch, so if you wanna play with a mercy main who's trying their best, just hit me up there!


	6. med bay

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> He shook his head,"It couldn't've been that bad... could it?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> do any of you know how to do southern abbreviations

- ** _mccree_** -

Jesse was in the middle of contemplating whether or not he should see how Hanzo was doing when Angela suddenly barged out of the med bay. Her blonde hair was pulled up into a messy yet cute ponytail and her arms and hands were full of papers flying around. The doctor's perfect and young skin combined with her impressive doctor abilities and angelic wings, despite currently not being in use, made her really seem like a real life angel. 

"Doc! How's Hanzo? He doin' 'kay? I dunno why, but I keep feelin' guilty o'er the last time we- um.... Angela?"

Angela was so absorbed in her work that she almost didn't notice the impatient and worried cowboy talking to her. Flinching at the sudden sound of her name, she instantly glanced up and gave a weak smile, "Jesse! Sorry, I did not notice you there. I've been trying to research a bit about panic attacks. How may I help you?"

"Well, I just wanna know how the archer's been doin'."

"Ah yes, Mr. Shimada. He is doing fine, I suppose. Though he did have a panic attack yesterday and mentioned the name Erin. I was actually just on my way to ask Genji if he knew anyone by that name." Mercy organized her papers a bit before giving him a tired yet charming smile, "Well, I'll be on my way."

Instantly, the man could tell she hadn't been sleeping recently. Even with her pale makeup covering the bags underneath her eyes, the lack of her usual optimistic smile gave it away. Not to mention she seemed a little bit shaky and twitchy. And when was the last time he saw Mercy in the kitchen? Obviously worried for one of his closest friends, his voice dropped down to a whisper, leaning in closer, as if saying something personal, "You should take a break, doc. Don't want ya overworkin' yerself... ain't nobody wanna 'nother Nano Essay, 'kay?"

The Swiss doctor's face seemed to fall a bit at the mention of one of her lower, yet not quite _the_  lowest, moments, "Don't worry, not even I want to repeat that. Thank you for looking out for me. See you around, Jesse."

Once Angela was out of his line of sight, he walked into the med bay. Jesse had certainly been here many times in the past. At first it was because of the little injuries he got in battles. Then things started to go downhill. The cowboy was stabbed in the arm during one of the missions and the doc was forced to replace his dead arm with a new, prosthetic one. McCree's eye also started to burn and hurt after using his special ability- deadeye. It got to the point where Gabriel Reyes and Jack Morrison were forced to ban him from using his ultimate power so he could relax his eyes (which was possibly one of the worst weeks of his life). This was also around the time where the two commanders of Overwatch started to bicker about who should have gotten the position of Strike Commander. Not even a week later, the cowboy packed his bags and left without a word. Jesse often wondered if Reyes or Morrison ever noticed that he had gone or if they tried to listen to locate where the cowboy went. However, now was not the time to be reminiscing the past. Now was the time to move forward and forgive mistakes... And here he was, trying to forgive a stranger for what had to be one of the biggest and worst mistakes Jesse had ever heard of. When Genji spoke of what Hanzo had done as a mistake long ago, McCree could only laugh at the absurdness of striking your kin down almost to the point of no return and still being able to call it a mistake.

Standing in front of the man himself now, the cowboy could feel his thoughts and opinions about the situation turning a new leaf. The man's face was scrunched up as if experiencing a unfavorable dream or thought. It reminded Jesse of the face he made when he accidentally called Gabe 'dad' and the commander wouldn't stop calling him 'son', or the face Tracer made when Genji and Lúcio high-fived after they teamed up to win a race against her.

"I expect that you will trust and respect my decision to forgive my brother for the mistakes he made when he was younger." A slightly robotic voice filled the silence. The southern man did not flinch; after all, he was, sadly, used to the cyborg's voice after all these years listening to it.

"I'll respect yer decision. Just don't understand it. I dunno if I'd be able ta do the same- ta forgive somebody who almost killed me." McCree took out a cigar and lit it up, breathing out a little puff of smoke before tapping it slightly on the little drawer nearby.

If Genji was not wearing a face mask, his face would most definitely be scrunched up at the sight of smoking. The younger man made a big deal of waving away the smoke with his hand as if he was going to choke on it and die, "McCree, you know Angela will have your head for smoking indoors. She already does not like you smoking those cigars anywhere."

He was suddenly reminded about the encounter he just had with her, "Oh yeah, reminds me. The doc was looking for ya. Somethin' 'bout an Erin?"

The name seemed to have a nasty effect on Genji. He visibly flinched, the Japanese man's body language tensing up. The air seemed a bit more tense, making Jesse almost regret mentioning the name- _almost._ The sound of silence filled the air- not even their breaths or the noisy trio (a.k.a Tracer, Lúcio, and D.Va) made any noise. It felt like a long eternity before one of them decided to speak up. The Shimada brother took in a few deep breaths, as if calming himself down.

"I apologize. That was a name I never wished to hear again. Hanzo must have mentioned it unconsciously." He could see Jesse's curiosity about the name, but he could only shake his head, "It is not my story to tell. It is my brother, though I doubt he would ever share it. _I_ wasn't even supposed to know about it, but I am very, very glad I knew. I must leave immediately and ask Angela more about what she heard."

McCree knew better than to go after the green cyborg and question more, so he returned the slight bow that was given to him and let the younger man quickly slither out of the med bay. Now he couldn't help but wonder what had happen. What happened to Hanzo? Who _was_ Erin and what did he have to do with this? Where is he now?

He shook his head,"It couldn't've been _that_ bad... could it?"

* * *

 

- _ **hanzo**_ -

The man swore he was falling- after all, there was nothing supporting his feet, so the only logical explanation had to be he was falling to his death.

"So this is how I will leave this world." He muttered to himself, feeling the wind blow into his hair, "At least it will be quick. I wonder how Genji is doing..." He felt himself relax at the thought of sweet release. Right before he could hit the floor and drown in the water, Hanzo (sadly) felt himself jerk awake.

The room was the perfect shade for sleeping, with the window shades down and just a sliver of sunlight coming in. To the right of him was a nightstand with flowers and a clipboard, which caught his interest. There was neat handwriting on it, yet Hanzo's vision was too blurry and unfocused to be able to concentrate on reading and understanding the words. He did, however, recognize the logo on the top right hand corner of the paper- the symbol of Overwatch. By deductive reasoning, the elder Shimada brother guessed he was in the medical bay of Genji's new affliction. If that was the case, why was Hanzo inside?

"Ah, Mister Shimada! I see you are awake." He instantly shifted his head to the familiar soft voice- the person who had been taking care of him. Seeing the body that the voice belonged to now only strengthened his belief that he had been saved by an angel sent from above. The lady standing in front of him had a young face with pale blond hair in a messy ponytail, something Hanzo could respect. Her eyes were a bright, beautiful shade of blue as if saying ' _I've got you_. She had even adorned a golden halo and what seemed to be mechanical wings on her back. _Definitely_ an angel.

Clearing his voice, he tried to thank her for saving him and ask for her name, but she waved her hand, "Please, call me Angela. And Do not worry about thanking me. It is always my pleasure to help those in need. Also, I believe that it is best you rest your voice. That screaming earlier surely must have done a number on you."

Hanzo could feel himself slowly getting more tired, as if her words could magically make him do what she said. His last thought had to have been _'screaming?'._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> my tumblr is oui-okay if any of you want to bother me with reminders about the story or requests for drawings/fanfics. i'll be happy to do all of them!!!
> 
> i think i should create an uploading schedule so these chapters aren't so unpredictable...  
> anyways, i hope you guys like this chapter! i am so glad for all the support you guys are giving me!!


	7. self doubt

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In that moment, Hanzo realized he didn't want to spend his time with anyone else.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> very very very very very slight warning for self harm mention (just skip the section with ~~~~ surrounding it)

- _ **hanzo**_ -  
  
Hanzo wanted to get to know more about the angel who had saved him and possibly talk to that man who had looked like so much like Erin.

_Maybe it was actually Erin. Maybe he's hunting you down like he promised to do if you left Japan._

The elder Shimada brother should have stayed in his home and listened to his best friend. Now he had access to Genji and himself. How would he escape this time?

Hanzo didn't know he was sobbing until a soft, yet firm grip on his arm woke him up into reality. He flinched harshly at the sudden light that filled his eyes when they opened. It took a minute to get his eyes to focus on the blurry figures in front of him. ( _Erin had always suggested that he wore glasses..._ )

The angel- who had introduced herself as Angela, a fitting name- was the one with her arm grasping onto his. Her other hand had a tissue, uselessly dabbing away tears as they messed with her makeup. Her mouth was moving as if trying to speak something to him, but he just couldn't make anything out.

_You made the angel cry. You are not worth the pure tears of an angel._

Genji was standing to her right, or his left. The cyborg’s face mask was off, revealing his brother’s severely scared face. He looked like he was bubbling with regret and guilt. An omnic stood - or floated- by the younger Shimada’s side, a hand on his shoulder as if trying to comfort him.

_He obviously regrets forgiving you. How could you think for a second that you deserve it?_

On his left stood the man from before. He was a wearing ridiculous cowboy getup with the spur boots, the iconic cowboy hat, and a huge, obnoxious belt that read an acronym Hanzo would never dare to say out loud. His skin was tanned and his beard and hair were untamed and wild. Now that he was actually observing with more detail, he realized how different Erin and this man was. The only similarity had to have been the brown eyes- _but many people had brown eyes, did they not?_

He felt words being murmured to him, telling him to calm down and think positive thoughts. He could feel the panic slowly dying in him, as if he was too tired to worry.

“ _Don't worry Mr. Shimada, you are safe._ ”

“ _Brother, you must forgive yourself._ ”

“ _Experience tranquility._ ”

“ _I dunno ya but i do know that everyone deserves a second change._ ”

The words made Hanzo feel warm inside for the first time. He finally felt as if people cared about him, that they wanted him to be happy. This feeling was so eerily familiar. It took him a while to realize just why it did, and suddenly his vision went dark and he could not longer feel that happiness.  
  


* * *

  
“Han! Han! Oh _there you are_. I was so worried! Class has ended!” A voice shook the Shimada heir back into reality. How long had he been out? He could hear a soft, constant ringing in his ears. Otherwise, the room was completely silent- a rare occurrence these days.  Hanzo blinked his eyes open, getting used to the light level outside. He could tell that school had ended. Why was he dozing off during class? Glancing over at the other person, he then realized it was Erin. _Of course_ it was Erin. Who else would be brave enough to go near the elder Shimada brother and dare to shout in his ear? Who else would be kind enough to care about where he was and how he was doing?

“Do not worry Erin.” Hanzo let a slight grin appear on his face. He found himself smiling more than often these days, “I am still well and alive.”

“You had me _so_ nervous. It's not like you to sleep during class. Are you sure you're getting enough sleep?”

Just having someone who cares about him like this caused his heart to burst with emotion. Hanzo couldn't help but want to hug the man in front of him. After many years of never being comforted and never shown compassion, he felt urges for human contact and a sense of acceptance. He stood up slowly, brushing off dust on his clothes, before picking up his items. He made sure he had all of his stuff in place before glancing over at Erin, who stared back with his beautiful brown eyes.

In that moment, Hanzo realized he didn't want to spend his time with anyone else.  
  


* * *

  
“Erin, what are your opinions on Jason’s boyfriend?”

“I can't believe he's one of _those_ people. I feel like I'm gonna throw up whenever I see them.”

“But.. they are happy.. Isn't that what matters the most?”

“They might be, but no one else is.”  
  


* * *

  
- _ **mccree**_ -

It took a while before the archer opened his eyes again. McCree felt blessed that the man did not have another panic attack when looking at him. In fact, this time, it looked as if Hanzo had calmed down after observing the cowboy’s face, which Jesse had obviously taken as a compliment. He realized he had a lot of time to himself and decided to ask Genji for more information and such about his brother.

“Genji! Nice ta see ya. I was wonderin’ if you could- _a_ \- tell me a bit ‘bout yer brother, Hanzo.” McCree asked loudly as he walked into the cyborg’s room. The two of them were fairly close, which meant the two of them could enter in the other’s room without having to really ask.

The man glanced up at the sound of the spurs, carefully studying his face to see if there was a catch. Finally, he started to speak, “Is there a particular reason you are suddenly interested in my brother, Jesse?”

“Of _course_ not! I just wanna know more ‘bout ‘im. I mean, he's gonna be workin’ with us. I wanna know how he's gonna be to, _ya know_... prepare?”

Genji’s head nodded as if agreeing with his words. After what seemed like an eternity, he pressed on a button and the face mask piece on the cyborg body opened up, allowing McCree to see the injuries and scars on the young man’s face. There was barely anything human left.

“Even after all these years, I can't get used ta that.” Jesse took off his hat, placing it near his heart. The two of them made eye contact before looking away.

“Do not fret. I am trying to make a point.” Genji glanced up into the sky, as if reminiscing about the past, “My brother is a strange man. He wears strange clothing and he does not like conforming, especially when it goes against what he believes. He does not know, nor does he want to know, society's rules and how one is supposed to act around others. He is, undoubtedly, one of the most awkward people I have ever known in my entire life. However, the family and life we were born in completely ignored what he thought. They didn't care if he was in need of comfort or crying in pain. All they did was hurt him and tell him to stop crying, that he was the heir of the clan. They forced him to do this, Jesse. They brainwashed him into thinking this was the right thing to do. You don't understand all that pain he went through.”

The cowboy looked as if he was going to interrupt, but Genji cut him off quickly. His voice turned aggressive, tears threatening to fall.

“And don't you _dare_ say anything otherwise. They taught him how to kill, Jesse. They _taught him how to kill_ and he wasn't even a _teenager_ yet, Jesse. I know he didn't want to do it. I remember him crying every night. I didn't know why he was crying at the time, but I had held him in my arms and told him that it was going to be okay. Hanzo tried to warn me ahead of time… but I wouldn't listen.” The younger Shimada then looked down to the floor, his cheeks wet, “And then… and then.. Erin came… I thought he was a blessing from the sky. He made my brother so happy- so much more happier than anyone in our family could do… but it didn't end good.. It didn't end good at all… Erin took advantage of him and his naivety. He lured Hanzo in with empty promises, and when he saw my brother in a state of being comfortable in relaxed, he pounced on the chance…. I- I found Hanzo… I found him- he was-”

Jesse could see the man in front of him was close to breaking down, so he quickly darted over to support him, “Genji, you don't need to continue.”

“If I don't, he’ll never ask for help. He’ll live suffering in pain for the rest of his life…” The room went silent before Genji sniffed, trying to wipe away a tear, “I cannot continue. I have already spoken enough… Hanzo will never forgive me for this, will he?”

McCree couldn't help but feel bad for the two of them. The two brothers had had a close relationship when they were younger; they were like two peas in a pod. They were always together, laughing with and at each other, inseparable by all means. However, being the heirs of a criminal clan punished anything that was not business related. According to drunk Genji's tales, one night, Hanzo didn't show up to their daily meet-ups, where they talk about anything they wanted to. After that night, apparently, the elder brother had never been the same.  

The cowboy patted the younger man’s shoulder, trying to stop the tears, “There, there, Genji. It’s ‘kay. He ain't gonna suffer anymore. We’ll protect ‘im. _I’ll_ protect ‘im.”

“Thank you. Hanzo has been through much more than a normal human should have gone through. He is filled with guilt and self-doubt, and I no longer want him to be like that.”

“I know, I know. I’ll help too.”  
  


* * *

 

  
- _ **hanzo**_ -  
  
This time, when the dragon-tattooed archer decided to open his eyes, the room felt cold and empty. He shivered, pulling the slightly warm sheets towards him. He could feel a strange inside of him, as if he was yearning for something. Perhaps feeling the warmth of everyone caring about him has made Hanzo feel like he deserved more than he currently had. 

_That's not allowed, Hanzo... You know the rules...  
_

~~~~~~~  
“No.. that's not true...” His voice trailed off, knowing it was useless. He could feel his right hand moving to his other arm, feeling the little bumps and scars that he had gotten over the years. Hanzo’s nail pressed gently into the arm, sending slight shivers down his spine. He would have continued had it not been for whoever decided to enter the med bay. At first, he would've guessed it was Angela, but he noticed the soft sound of spurs clicking. Cursing softly in Japanese, Hanzo made himself seem more normal.  
~~~~~~~  
  
“Oh, hey. Didn't know ya were awake. I'll comm the doc.”

Hanzo looked up slowly to find the ridiculous man with the cowboy getup and the beautiful brown eyes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i'm sorry this was so badly written- it was typed on my phone and i'm really tired so it's not completely edited  
> nonetheless, i hope you guys like this!!


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